So, today was pretty much the worse day of our lives....the day that we had to leave the hospital without our little girls. We know that they are in great hands and will be extremely well taken care of, but there is something just so completely unnatural about not being able to take your baby home with you. Leaving them behind was hands down the most painful thing I've ever had to do. Everyone wondered how I got through the past couple of months with such a positive attitude and without completely losing my mind - on strict bedrest - in and out of the hopsital, with my most recent admission being my last, as I was put on "lifer" status until the babies arrived. But truly, that emotional roller coaster was basically the equivalent of the tea cup ride compared to what I've felt since they've been born, and on this day in particular. I was a complete and total basketcase. There's no other way to put it. This is a day that I will never ever forget.
The day started out pretty good believe it or not. I mean, I woke up hysterical and was a blubbering mess before I even made it out of bed. But I cracked a smile when I looked down as I pumped away and noticed that I got my milk in. Finally the NICU nurses and doctors will leave me alone!! I went down to the NICU this morning with extra pep in my step, proud of the milk that I'd just made. :-) Today, even though I was being forced to go home, I would leave behind a piece of me to help my girls. Okay, enough of that, I'm sure the male folk don't appreciate it.
Anywho - let's talk about the girls. They are both still on under the phototherapy light, but their bilirubin numbers are getting better and their color looks great as far as I can tell. An early morning x-ray for Maddie once again showed that her lungs were still significantly immature and had some fluid in them as well. So, she would be staying on the ventilator for a while longer. To make adjustments to prepare Maddie (and her lungs) for the possibility of coming off the ventilator at some time in the near future, they decreased the amount of oxygen she was receiving and to make up for this, they increased the pressure at which the oxygen was flowing through the tube. Maddie is now on a every 6 hour feeding schedule, taking 2 ml at all of her feedings and digesting just about all of her milk. The big event for Maddie today was that she had a PICC line put in. A PICC line is a peripherally inserted central catheter. It's kind of comparable to an IV line in an adult, but the IV line here goes all the way up through her arm and advances through larger veins. This is one central line which can now be used for an extended period of time to give Maddie all of her medications, electrolytes, lipids, etc. Until this point, she had lines going through her belly button at the umbilical cord site, but this site can only be used up to the first week due to risk of infection. For now, they'll keep the umbilical cord lines active as well, until they make sure that the PICC line is working properly and then they'll remove the umbilical cord lines.
Melia had a much better day today. She was much more relaxed on the ventilator and you could tell that she was taking advantage of having the ventilator do most of the work for her after working so hard and exhausting herself for the past few days. She enjoyed mommy's milk and is now being fed 2 ml every 4 hours. Like her sister the other day, Melia was given a suppository and is finally pooping out some of those toxins so she can hopefully come off the phototherapy light soon.
The day started out pretty good believe it or not. I mean, I woke up hysterical and was a blubbering mess before I even made it out of bed. But I cracked a smile when I looked down as I pumped away and noticed that I got my milk in. Finally the NICU nurses and doctors will leave me alone!! I went down to the NICU this morning with extra pep in my step, proud of the milk that I'd just made. :-) Today, even though I was being forced to go home, I would leave behind a piece of me to help my girls. Okay, enough of that, I'm sure the male folk don't appreciate it.
Anywho - let's talk about the girls. They are both still on under the phototherapy light, but their bilirubin numbers are getting better and their color looks great as far as I can tell. An early morning x-ray for Maddie once again showed that her lungs were still significantly immature and had some fluid in them as well. So, she would be staying on the ventilator for a while longer. To make adjustments to prepare Maddie (and her lungs) for the possibility of coming off the ventilator at some time in the near future, they decreased the amount of oxygen she was receiving and to make up for this, they increased the pressure at which the oxygen was flowing through the tube. Maddie is now on a every 6 hour feeding schedule, taking 2 ml at all of her feedings and digesting just about all of her milk. The big event for Maddie today was that she had a PICC line put in. A PICC line is a peripherally inserted central catheter. It's kind of comparable to an IV line in an adult, but the IV line here goes all the way up through her arm and advances through larger veins. This is one central line which can now be used for an extended period of time to give Maddie all of her medications, electrolytes, lipids, etc. Until this point, she had lines going through her belly button at the umbilical cord site, but this site can only be used up to the first week due to risk of infection. For now, they'll keep the umbilical cord lines active as well, until they make sure that the PICC line is working properly and then they'll remove the umbilical cord lines.
Melia had a much better day today. She was much more relaxed on the ventilator and you could tell that she was taking advantage of having the ventilator do most of the work for her after working so hard and exhausting herself for the past few days. She enjoyed mommy's milk and is now being fed 2 ml every 4 hours. Like her sister the other day, Melia was given a suppository and is finally pooping out some of those toxins so she can hopefully come off the phototherapy light soon.
In an effort to get the girls to stop desaturating when we touch them, since they get overstimulated so easily, I was taught this "hand hugging" technique by one of the NICU nurses. Typically with this technique you're really not supppose to touch the baby at all, but just cup your hands around her. I need to touch my little girls, so I cupped them very lightly at their hands and their feet - giving them a sense of security and confinement, without making them feel held down. It really works great, especially with Melia. Whenever I see her oxygen levels getting low due to stimulation, I hold her like this and talk quietly to her - her oxygen levels come right back up to normal - and it's such a great feeling knowing that I helped to calm her even though I can't pick her up and soothe her the way that I'd like to.
