I've been having a serious case of cabin fever lately. Being out of work and literally just staying home with the girls has had me in a place reminiscent of being on bedrest - feeling bored and unable to do the things that I'd like to do. The only things we're really allowed to do with the girls, are take them to outdoor places, but the weather has been so screwy around here that even a trip to the park has been just about impossible. On Friday I insisted that we get out of the house. I really wanted to take the girls outside for some fresh air, since soon enough, we won't even be able to do that. So we decided to take a trip to Point Pleasant and introduce the girls to the beach and boardwalk - it was the perfect day for it. It's amazing how people flock to a couple walking around with twins. I hate this attention. Mike, on the other hand, loves this attention. A wedding party there actually wanted to get their pictures taken with the girls. How random is that? People just love twins! So many people would ask how old they were and when I would say "15 weeks" or "just about 4 months" their reactions were all the same - "oh my God, they're soooo tiny!" - I found myself feeling the need to explain. Finally I decided to just use their adjusted age of 5 weeks, so that the size of my children would make sense to other people and I wouldn't need to explain their story. 
We had lunch outside at the Tiki Bar. As our french fries got cold because the girls decided that they wanted to eat a half hour early - as we sat there feeding them instead of feeding ourselves, we laughed at how much things have changed. This time last year, a trip to the Tiki Bar would've been a completely different experience! After lunch we walked the boardwalk and took a quick stroll on the beach just to take some pictures. The sun, while it was only about 70 degrees and wasn't very hot, seemed to be bothering the girls eyes - and we didn't want to be out in the sun too long anyway. Mike won some stuffed animals for the girls - a little stuffed dinosaur for Melia and a BIG stuffed pug for Maddie. The pug was fitting for Maddie since her acid reflux always has her sounding congested, and we always say that she breathes like a pug. ;-) Poor little Madster!
And speaking of - the poor little Madster has been keeping things interesting around here. She started giving me problems taking her formula on Sunday. All day long she wouldn't take more than 1 or 2 ounces at a time. She has always been our fussy eater, but on Sunday she took it to a whole new level. I really couldn't figure out what the issue was. As far as I was concerned, she wasn't constipated because she had just pooped that morning, so being "backed up" shouldn't have been an issue that would effect her eating. I started thinking that maybe she needed to be moved to the next stage nipple on her bottle, but then I figured that couldn't be the case because she just went on stage 2 nipples a couple weeks ago and a stage 3 nipple is made for 6+ months - and developmentally, Maddie is still only a 5 week old, so she really shouldn't even be on the stage 2 nipples that are made for 3 month olds. So I talked myself out of the idea that she needed a different nipple and figured maybe she was just having a bad day. But the next morning Mike became concerned about her congestion. I never really get too concerned about her congestion, because like I said before, we never really believe it to be true congestion and we always just chalk it up to her acid reflux. But Mike made the point that her last feeding was at 2am (he stayed up late and fed her as late as possible in an effort to get her hungry before feeding in the hopes that she'd take a full bottle) - and now it was 10am. So 7 hours had passed and she really shouldn't have been having reflux 7 hours after her last feeding. Good point. So, I called the pediatrician and made an appointment for her. I was reluctant to make the appointment because really, she looked fine. But Maddie having feeding issues can lead to weight loss, which would be a significant problem for her. So between that and the fact that at this point I wasn't sure if I could blame her congestion on acid reflux, I figured we were better safe than sorry. When Dr. Luke (the pediatrician) came into the exam room, I told him that we'd probably jumped the gun, but I just wanted her looked at. I was not at all expecting what happened next. He apparently didn't think we'd jumped the gun and felt that her breathing was rapid and labored. That combined with her feeding issues and the fact that he witnessed her spit up a few times while in the office, made him extremely concerned. He feared that she had come down with RSV and sent us straight to the emergency room. I couldn't believe this. I had just spent my morning on the phone with my insurance company regarding the girls' RSV vaccination (they need a vaccine every month from November through April), and here she may already have it. RSV (Respiratory syncytial virus) is a virus that causes infection in the lungs and breathing passages. In adults, it may only produce symptoms of a common cold, such as a stuffy or runny nose, sore throat, mild headache, cough, fever, and a general feeling of being ill. But in premature babies, who have a lower immune system and premature lungs, RSV infections can lead to other more serious illnesses and even death. Often times, a premature baby with RSV ends up admitted into the hospital and placed back on CPAP or even a ventilator. So when Dr. Luke expressed concern about a possible RSV infection, my heart dropped, my eyes filled with tears and I was in a complete panic. We went to the ER and after a few hours we found out that her chest xray was clear and her RSV test was negative - PHEW!! So then, what was the issue? At the time that I write this post, 2 days later, still no one knows. The ER doctors weren't concerned with her breathing patterns. They put her on the monitor and she was at 100% oxygen with room air. They believe that her rapid breathing is a result of her prematurity. As the one ER doctor said, if a full term newborn was breathing like that, they'd be concerned - but for a premature baby to breathe like that, it's not very alarming. I wish Dr. Luke had that same reaction! While at the ER they gave her pedialyte and she took it do in record speed. And they gave her a suppository and forced her to poop. Some of the doctors believe that maybe she was "backed up" and wasn't eating due to that. I didn't think this was an issue since she'd pooped Sunday morning, just before the feeding issues began - but they said that unless she's filling a diaper at least once a day, chances are there is still more in there - and due to her prematurity, her intenstines don't move her bowels as well as a full term baby - so constipation for her is a different issue than constipation in a full term baby. We left the ER without any real answers - maybe it's a cold, maybe she's constipated, maybe she's just a fussy eater and is looking for a new type of formula or bottle. So I spent the whole day yesterday experimenting with different things to try to figure out where this new feeding issue is coming from. When we give her pedialyte, she takes it, so I began to wonder if she was getting sick of the nasty tasty of her prescription formula - so I started mixing her prescription formula with her old formula to give it a taste boost - didn't work. I tried to make her poop again - she pooped, but it didn't make her any more likely to eat. The doctor had me giver her Mylanta one hour before eating - didn't work. I tried a totally new type of bottle - didn't work. Finally I went back to the thing that I contemplated trying in the very beginning - I changed her to a stage 3 nipple and VOILA! She took 4oz in no time. Since then I've been switching back and forth between the stage 2 and stage 3 nipples - apparently sometimes she wants to move quickly and other times she wants to take her time. This kid is HIGH MAINTENANCE! So, I'm not really sure what did the trick - the nipple switch seemed to be the last factor when we noticed a difference, but I guess it couldn't been a combination of all of my experiments. Who knows. For now, things are getting back on track. Maddie has been taking all of her formula for the past 5 feedings. Hopefully, she'll stay on track. Today, Melia has been coughing - so I'm pretty sure that even if Maddie is out of the woods, mommy isn't.
The whole Maddie going to the ER thing has been eye-opening. I make fun of myself for being this neurotic, overbearing, crazy mom that I never thought I'd be. But truthfully, I need to be this way for the safety of my children. People don't get it. And really, unless you too are the mother of a premature baby, I don't think people can or will get it. While the girls are full term and almost 6 weeks past their due date now - and they look like "normal" newborn babies - we have to remember that the mere fact that they were born premature makes them different. Their lungs, intestines and other major organs are still premature. Their immune systems are still very compromised and we have to safe-guard them as much as we can. They require special care. So people can think that I'm neurotic or overbearing, or even crazy - but the fact of the matter is that I'm protecting my children they way that they need to be protected. For those people who don't understand that and still think I'm just over-reacting, I really don't care - you can call me crazy - and I'll call you, ignorant.
